Cats I got a job writing book reviews, which basically means Harold gets a new bed delivered to the front door every other week. Harold and I both now have our dream jobs. Dogs Have you ever seen on Oprah or something where some lady saw a 20/20 documentary on orphans in Russia and was like, “I saw this boy on the TV and knew he was my son”? And […]
My gym held a competition, and in a moment of glee over having just eaten a really tasty salad, I signed up to compete. When I arrived that morning, everyone was milling around all happy and buzzy, clapping each other on the shoulders and talking about eating eggs for breakfast. Then the coaches called us over to a whiteboard and explained that unfortunately, some of us were about to die. Then […]
Stuff I Talk About 